High Anxiety

It’s something we don’t talk about enough — and I think we should. It should be normalized, not stigmatized.

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I initially posted a version of this in a Facebook group (Rally and Obedience for Beginners), and the response was pretty awesome — so I decided to expand it and post it as an article.

What my gut tells me is that not only is this not talked about enough, but people feel alone with their anxiety. It’s something we all feel to some degree, but how we experience it is unique to each of us.

When we show up at a trial, sometimes our own anxiety prevents us from seeing it in others. What we often miss is that we’re looking in a mirror.

This is a place where we need to cut each other some slack, understand, and support one another. And it’s also a place where those who aren’t feeling anxious have an opportunity to support those who are. Often, the one needing it most is the newcomer — the one who assumes everyone else has this all figured out.

Be the person who inspires them.

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How many of us have heard:

“Your nerves travel down the lead”?

Technically it’s not wrong — but it’s often used in a way that feels dismissive or overly simplistic. Like, “Well, just don’t be nervous then, because your dog will feel it.”

Oh. Cool. I’ll just… not have anxiety now. 🙄

Anxiety is normal. So the real question is: What do we do with it?

My coping mechanisms for a trial start with preparation and routine. I create a predictable routine and pattern for both me and my dog — and I practice it. A lot. It starts from the moment I arrive at the trial site, and I have it rehearsed down to the minute I walk in the ring. That includes acclimation, warm-up, a fun “get focused” routine, course memorization and visualization, walkthrough — and a few other details I’ve fine-tuned over time.

I also do some weird stuff — like purposely training in places that make me anxious. Not trial-level pressure, just regular old people-are-watching-me pressure. Parks. Sidewalks. Random public spaces. No scorecards, no judges — just that subtle social anxiety we all know.

And then I play. A lot.

Because I want my dog to learn that my anxiety doesn’t mean the world is ending. It’s just part of me. If I’m goofy, light, and engaged — even while feeling that tension — then their emotional response to my anxiety starts to shift too.

My goal is to lower my own inhibitions in front of people — to bring my public training persona as close as possible to the one I have at home or in familiar environments. Because if I can’t stay consistent, I can’t expect my dog to.

And by the way — the 3Ds of dog training apply to us, too. I train close enough to feel the pressure, but not so close that it affects my behavior. Just like with my dog, I gradually reduce that distance over time.

There are so many ways to reduce anxiety — or to learn how to perform with it. What I just described? That’s just scratching the surface of a non-scratch surface.

There’s a bigger point I want to highlight clearly: anxiety is a biochemical response — not a choice, and not something you can just “control.”

That really gets to the heart of why I’m writing this.

If there’s something that helps someone show up — whether that’s a training or preparation method, a grounding technique, a shift in mindset, or even a prescribed medication that empowers them to do something others take for granted? To enter the ring, to stay present, to maybe even Q and title when they never thought they could?

That’s what I want to normalize. Not just the conversation around anxiety, but the legitimacy of whatever tools people need to participate and succeed.

There are no wrong answers.

And for anyone quietly struggling with this: you’re not alone.

This post is part of MyRallyCoach’s ongoing mission to support the full experience of the handler — not just the technical aspects of Rally, but the emotional and mental side of the sport too.

Because how you feel matters. And your dog feels it too.

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Why I Built MyRallyCoach

Preparation is a great strategy for reducing anxiety. The more you understand the signs, the rules, and the little nuances of the sport, the more confident you’ll feel — and that confidence ripples down the lead.

That’s a big part of why I created MyRallyCoach. Between Sign Hints, Rally School, and the other tools in the app, my goal is to provide resources that support your skills, your knowledge, and your mindset — because performance isn’t just about what your dog does in the ring. It’s about what you bring in with you.

Whether you're just starting or coming back after a break, I want you to feel more prepared — and less alone.